February 2011

February 1, 2011

 “OLD BONES” NEWS

 February BirthdaysDiane , Miron, Jeannette , Stella , Janet   ♫ HAPPY Birthday to you! ♫

 Jan 25 to Feb 03 –    Cypress Tree

Cypress Tree (Faithfulness) — strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give but doesn’t necessarily like it, strives to be content, optimistic, wants to be financially independent, wants love and affection, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful, quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to

gain knowledge, needs to be needed.

Feb 09 to Feb 18 –    Cedar Tree

Cedar Tree (Confidence) — of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes unexpected presents, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often impatient, likes to impress others, has many talents, industrious, healthy optimism, waits for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.

Feb 19 to Feb 28 –    Pine Tree

Pine Tree (Peacemaker) — loves agreeable company, craves peace and harmony, loves to help others, active imagination, likes to write poetry, not fashion conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to, emotionally soft, low self esteem, needs affection and reassurance.

 Old Bones News

It has been decided by our members that the Center will open at 10:00 am and close at 3:00 pm.

Unfortunately, due to the discontinuation of funding from the Catholic Community Services we are no longer able to continue to enjoy large lunch meals.  Going forward we will experiment with various light lunches such as soup and a sandwich or if necessary just soup.  The extra money will go towards our rent for the center.

WHERE DID THE YEAR GO?

Suddenly we realize that with giant strides we started in last January and within a blink of an eye, 2010 is on its back!

A big “Thank You” to each and every one of you, for the impact you had on my life this year. Especially for all the e-mails I received…….without you, I’m sure that 2010 would have been extremely boring.

May 2011 mark the beginning of a Tidal Wave of Love, Happiness and Bright Futures.

And to those who need someone special, may you find that true love.

To those who need money, may your finances overflow.

To those who need caring, may you find a good heart.

To those who need friends, I am still here for you.  Thanks for being my friend!

All the best in 2011                                                                                                       Submitted by Barbara

A Thought to Remember

1          When you talk you learn nothing, when you listen you learn what others know.

2          An acre of performance is worth a world of promise.

3          Only those who can see the invisible can do the impossible.

4          We can’t change the message, the message changes us.

5          Of all the tonics devised by humanity, none is as stimulating as a good days’ work.

6          The most painful wound is a stab of conscience.

7          The entire sum of existence is the magic of being needed by just one person.

8          About the only thing a person can do on a shoestring nowadays is trip.

9          What you are is God’s gift to you, what you make of yourself is your gift to God.

10        Biscuits and sermons are improved by shortening.

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Edith

Every sixty seconds you spend angry, upset or mad is a full minute of happiness you’ll never get back.

Today’s Message: Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile.

Don’t Be Afraid to Fail

You’ve failed many times, although you may not remember.  You fell down the first time you tried to walk.  You almost drowned the first time you tried to swim, didn’t you?  Did you hit the ball the first time you swung a bat?  Heavy hitters, the ones who hit the most home runs, also strike out a lot.

R. H. Macy failed seven times before his store in New York caught on.

English novelist John Creasey got 753 rejection slips before he published 564 books.

Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times, but he also hit 714 home runs.

Don’t worry about failure.  Worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.

From: Wall Street Journal – United Technologies Corporation

Consider this:  After Fred Astaire’s first screen test, the memo from the testing director of MGM, dated 1933, said, “Can’t act!  Slightly bald! Can dance a little!”

Astaire kept that memo over the fireplace in his Beverly Hills home.

Socrates was called, “An immoral corrupter of youth.”

OBSTACLES

We who lived in the concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread.  They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: The last of his freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.           
Viktor E.  Frankl (Man’s Search for Meaning)

Information from the Government

 

Census jobs

The 2011 Census is staffing 35,000 jobs across Canada. 

The period of employment: early March to the end of July. (Start dates vary by assignment.)

Rate of pay: $14.72 to $18.04 per hour plus authorized expenses.

Hours of work: flexible, but must commit to at least 20 hours per week.

Requirement: must be 18 years of age or over.

To apply call 1-866-773-2011 – TTY: 1-800-363-7629 or www.census2011.qc.ca

Important Information from Revenue Quebec (received with the January GST cheque.)

In case you have forgotten there is little time left to register for direct deposit with Revenue Quebec to receive payments of the new solidarity tax credit.

As of July 2011, payments of the solidarity tax credit will replace payments of the QST credits, among others.  You will receive the payments by direct deposit only.

Registration can be done by mail on their website. www.revenu.gouv.qc.ca

The new solidarity tax credit combines the following into a single tax credit:

The QST credit

The property tax refund

(And: The credit for individuals living in northern villages)

If you are entitled to the tax credit, you will receive your monthly payments as of July 2011.

To receive solidarity tax credit payments, you must be registered for direct deposit.

If you are a senior or provide assistance to a senior, you have certain tax obligations and may be eligible for the following tax credits, programs and other tax benefits:

Income Tax Installments

Premium Payable under the Québec Prescription Drug Insurance Plan

Retirement Income

Shelter Allowance Program

Source Deductions of Income Tax

Tax Benefits

Tax Credit for Home-Support Services for seniors

Question?

Do you know where the smallest mall in the world is?   That would be in Tokyo, China.

You bet your sweet bippy I’ll pass this one on!   As a raise last year, seniors got 2/5 th of 1% on their Canada Pension and 0% on the Old Age Security.  

HOW TRUE IS THIS!

We’re “broke” & can’t help our own seniors, Homeless, Veterans, Orphans, etc.?
This is so pathetically true…in the last month we have provided aid to Haiti, Chile, and Turkey.
Now Pakistan, the same people that will turn around and build the IED’s that kill our troops.

Also another boat load of refugees has arrived from Sri Lanka that will get aid that should go to the CANADIAN people that have worked all their lives to make this the country it is today.

This year, over 8000 refugees that we know have snuck into Canada through ports and airports and all of whom will eventually get various aid from governments.

Our retired seniors living on fixed income receive no aid while our government and religious organizations pour hundreds of millions of dollars and tons of food to foreign countries.  We have hundreds of adoptable children who are shoved aside to make room for the adoption of foreign orphans.

Why are so many CANADIAN citizens, and the CANADIAN government, so star struck they won’t provide for our own?

CANADA: a country where we have homeless people, children going to bed without eating, elderly going without needed meds, and mentally ill without treatment – yet we have a benefit for the people of Haiti on 12 TV stations, ships and planes lining up with food, water, tents, clothes, bedding, doctors and medical supplies.  Imagine if we gave ourselves the same support that we gave all of these other countries.

I feel bad for them, but I also care about CANADA and our seniors who developed this great country, only to be forgotten.

Sad isn’t it?    99% of people won’t have the guts to forward this. I’m not one of them….. How about you??

Submitted by Barbara

SENIOR HEALTH CARE SOLUTION – ACCORDING TO MAXINE

So you’re a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you – what do you do?

Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot 2 MP’s and 2 Ministers – not necessarily dead!  

Of course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get 3 meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating, and all the health care you need!  New teeth – no problem.  Need glasses, great.  New hip, knees, kidney, lungs, heart?  All covered. (And your kids can come and visit you as often as they do now).

And who will be paying for all of this?  The same government that just told you that you they cannot afford for you to go into a home.  Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay any income taxes anymore.

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?                                     Submitted by Barbara

HEALTH AND WELFARE

Good News about eggs and cholesterol

Developed by the Registered Detains at Egg Farmers of Canada (From a brochure in a doctor’s office)

If you have been avoiding eggs because you’re worried about cholesterol – it’s time to reconsider.  Experts agree that there’s no link between eating eggs and a higher risk of heart disease.  In fact, numerous studies have shown that an egg a day is OK! 

Omega – 3 eggs are produced by hens fed a diet enriched with flaxseed, which is a source of omega-3 fatty acids.

Omega-3 fatty acids cannot be produced by your body and must be obtained from the foods you eat. Scientific research has shown that natural fatty acids help manage heart disease.

They have been shown to help

1          Lower blood pressure

2          Reduce the risk of blood clots and blocked blood vessels

3          Protect against abnormal heart rhythms that can cause sudden death.

4          Prevent hardening of the arteries.

The experts agree…eggs are a key part of your healthy diet.  Two eggs are considered a serving of meat and alternatives according to Canada’s Food Guide.

(This is interesting) A large long-term prospective study showed that people who ate 6 or more eggs a week had no increased risk of heart disease?

It doesn’t take much to make a difference to your heart health.  Reduce your risk of heart disease by making these simple lifestyle changes.

1) Eat nutritious foods more often.

2) Get to and maintain a healthy weight.

3) Aim for 30 – 60 minutes of exercise each day.

4) Substitute harmful saturated and Trans fats with healthier unsaturated fats in your diet.

IF YOU HAVE DIFFICULTY walking up steep hills try this trick.  Walk in a zig zag fashion from the curb to the other side of the sidewalk and back to the curb again etc. etc. all the while advancing up the hill.  Stress is lessened greatly using this technique.  I tried it and it works.

Words of Wisdom

We will open the book.  Its pages are blank.  We are going to put words on them ourselves. 

The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Years Day.

Edith Lovejoy Pierce                                                                                                    Submitted by Ted

DID YOU KNOW?

The Leaning Tower of Pisa has never been straight.  Soon after building started in 1173, the foundation of the Tower settled unevenly.  Construction was stopped, and was continued only 100 years later.  It then became visibly clear that the Tower was tilting to the south.

Since regular measuring of the Tower began in 1911, the top of the Tower has moved 1,2 millimeters (0.05 inch) per year.  Today the top of the Tower is some 5,3 m (17,4 ft.) off centre.

Because of corrections during the building phase, the Tower is slightly curved, like a banana.  Engineers are working on the footing of the Tower rather than the structure, hoping to ease the top back about 20 cm (about 8 inches).  But it means that the 800 year old Tower will remain leaning.

The Tower stands in Piazza dei Miracoli (Miricle Square)

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Frank

Latin is a dead language, and it’s killing me

Dear Ann:  I agree with your response to the woman who wanted to know if she should take Latin.  Latin was required when I was in grades 8 and 9 in Plains, Ga.  Since our books were not paid for by the state, we bought our own, often from older students.  I am 79 now, but I still remember buying a used Latin book with this handwritten message inside:

Latin is a dead language as dead as it can be.

It killed all the Romans, and now it’s killing me.

All are dead who wrote it. All are dead who spoke it.

All died who learn it – Blessed death – they earn it.

“Despite that earlier student’s feelings, I have always been glad that I took Latin.”  Frances Phipps, Fort Worth.

Dear Frances: The readers echoed (20 – 1) the sentiments expressed in that poem.  

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Frank

SAYINGS

Behind every successful woman is an enormous pile of laundry.

Some people are good at counting calories; they have the figures to prove it.
Some waiters should visit the zoo and see the turtles whizzing past.

It is time to diet when you nod your chin and the other two agree.

Never lend money to a friend it ruins their memory.

A mosquito is the first original skin diver.

The Lord giveth and the Government taketh away.

She calls her car “flattery” because it gets her nowhere.

He who hesitates is interrupted.                                                                                     Submitted by Pat

Quote:

 Failure?   I never encountered it. All I ever met were temporary setbacks. –                              Dottie Walters

 

 

 

 

 

LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE
A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards.

The man, who was a priest, said, “I am a Father.”

The little boy replied, “My Daddy doesn’t wear his collar like that.”

The priest looked up from his book and answered, ”I am the Father of many.”

The boy said, ”My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn’t wear his collar that way!” The priest, getting impatient, said. “I am the Father of hundreds”, and went back to reading his book.

The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, “Maybe you should wear a condom, and put your pants on backwards instead of your collar.”                                           Submitted by Barbara

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation.  He wrote:

I would very much like to bring my dog with me.  He is well-groomed and very well behaved.  Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, I’ve been operating this hotel for many years.  In all that time, I’ve never had a dog steal towels, bed clothes or silverware or pictures off the walls.  I’ve never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for getting drunk and disorderly.  And I’ve never had a dog run out on a hotel bill.

Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel.  And, if your dog will vouch for you, you’re welcome to stay here, too.

Karl Albrecht and Ron Zenke- Service America           

Group therapy

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. “You all have obsessions,” he observed.

To the first mother, Mary, he said, “You are obsessed with eating. You’ve even named your daughter Candy.”

He turned to the second Mom, Ann: “Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child’s name, Penny.”

He turned to the third Mom, Joyce: “Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child’s name, Brandy.”

At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand, and whispered,

“Come on Dick, this guy has no idea what he’s talking about. Let’s pick up Peter and Willy from school and go get dinner.”                                                                                                                        Submitted by Barbara

SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER

You Don’t Have To Own A Cat To Appreciate This One!  You don’t even have to like ’em!

We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard.

We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house.

The cat we put out in the yard, scoots back into the house.. We didn’t want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird.

My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.

Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn’t want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, ‘He’s just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother.’

A few minutes later, I get into the cab. ‘Sorry I took so long,’ I said, as we drove away. ‘That stupid

b…. was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me.  But it worked! I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!’

The cab driver hit a parked car.                                                                                    Submitted by Barbara

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.  They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, ‘Corned beef and cabbage!  If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I’m going to jump off this building.’

The Mexican! Opened his lunch box and exclaimed,’ Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time, I’m going to jump off, too.’

The blonde opened his lunch and said, ‘ Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I’m jumping too.’

The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death..

The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.

The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman’s wife was weeping. She said, ‘If I’d known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!’

The Mexican’s wife also wept and said, ‘I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn’t realize he hated burritos so much.’

Everyone turned and stared at the blonde’s wife. The blonde’s wife said, ” Don’t look at me. The idiot makes his own lunch.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Submitted by Ted

WORST FIRST DATE STORY EVER

If you didn’t see this on the Tonight show, I hope you’re sitting down when you read it.  This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter….Snowing and quite cold and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah.

It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of   nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and  slow going, there came a  point where she told him that he had  better stop and let her go beside the  road, or it would be the  front seat of his car

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn’t have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her   companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.  All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.

Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car’s fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date’s concerns about’ what is taking so long’ with a reply that indeed, she was ‘freezing her butt off’ and in need of some   assistance!

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose   themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem.

Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be ‘pants down. ‘And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno’s comment:’ This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off.’

Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Cheryl

 

 

How It’s Done In Cape Breton

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at Province House in Halifax…One from Yarmouth, another from the Valley and the third from Cape Breton. They go with a Public Works official to examine the fence. The Yarmouth contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil.

“Well,” he says, “I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me.”

The Valley contractor also does some measuring and figuring, and then says I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me.”

The Cape Breton contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the Official and whispers, “$2,700.”

The official, incredulous, says, “You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?”

The CB contractor whispers back, “$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you, and we hire the guy from the Valley to fix the fence.”

Gander Tower, Newfoundland

Some of you will enjoy this more   than others…Newfoundlanders can be so polite!

Gander Tower: “Saudi Air 511 — You are cleared to land on runway 9R.”

Saudi Air: “Thank you Gander. Acknowledge cleared to land on infidel’s runway 9R – Allah be Praised.”

Gander Tower: ” Iran Air 711 – You are cleared to land on runway 27L.”

Iran Air: “Thank you Gander. We are cleared to land on infidel’s runway 27L. – Allah is great.”

Pause….

Saudi Air:  “GANDER TOWER – GANDER TOWER!”

Gander Tower: “Go ahead Saudi Air 511…”

Saudi Air: “YOU HAVE CLEARED BOTH OUR AIRCRAFT FOR THE SAME RUNWAY GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS. WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE . . . . . INSTRUCTIONS, PLEASE?”

Gander Tower: “Well bless your hearts, and praise Jesus.  Proceed to your destination and tell Allah we said “Hi”.

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Cheryl

Finally, someone has cleared this up

For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads. Most of us have naively thought this was connected with tradition or religion, but the Indian embassy in Ottawa has recently revealed the true story.

When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop, a taxi cab, or a motel in Toronto. If nothing is there, he must remain in India to answer telephones for Bell Canada and provide us with technical advice.

My Dad’s Job
 David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living.  All the typical answers came up – fireman, policeman, salesman, office worker, etc.

However, David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked his specifically about his father. “My father’s an exotic dancer in a gay bar and he takes off all his clothes in front of other men!  Sometimes, if the offer’s really good, he’ll make a date with some guy and go out with him for money!”

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring, and took little David aside and asked him,  

“David, is that really true about your father?’

“Well, No,” said David, “Actually, he plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs but I was just too embarrassed to say that in front of all the other kids.”  (True story)                                                         Submitted by Barbara
 

 

An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet

Twenty-thousand Euros on a single roll of the dice.

She said, ‘I hope you   don’t mind, but I feel much luckier when I’m completely nude’.

With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled he dice and with an Irish brogue yelled,  
‘Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!’

As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed…’YES! YES! I WON, I WON!’

She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.

The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, ‘What did she roll?’

The other answered, ‘I don’t know – I thought you were watching.’

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Barbara

 MORAL OF THE STORY    Not all Irish are drunks, Not all blondes are dumb, But all men…are men.

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning ,,uphill Barefoot. BOTH ways� yadda, yadda, yadda

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it and how easy they’ve got it!

But now that I’m over the ripe old age of forty, I can’t help but look around and notice the youth of today. You’ve got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia! And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don’t know how good you’ve got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn’t have the Internet.  If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!! 

There was no e-mail!! We had to actually write somebody a letter – with a pen!  Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox, and it would take a week to get there! Stamps were 10 cents!

When I was a kid, continued

Child Protective Services didn’t care if our parents beat us. As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also had permission to kick our ass! Nowhere was safe!

There were no MP3’s or Napsters or iTunes! If you wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself!

Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio, and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! There were no CD players! We had tape decks in our car. We’d play our favorite tape and “eject” it when finished, and then the tape would come undone rendering it useless. Cause, hey, that’s how we rolled, Baby! Dig?

We didn’t have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal, that’s it!  There weren’t any cell phones either. If you left the house, you just didn’t make a call or receive one. You actually had to be out of touch with your “friends”. OH MY GOSH! Think of the horror not being in touch with someone 24/7! And then there’s TEXTING. Yeah, right. Please! You kids have no idea how annoying you are.

And we didn’t have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your parents, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, the collection agent… you just didn’t know! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn’t have any fancy PlayStation or Xbox video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like ‘Space Invaders’ and ‘Asteroids’. Your screen guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens; it was just one screen… Forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel NO REMOTES! Oh, no, what’s the world coming to?!

There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I’m saying? We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!

And we didn’t have microwaves. If we wanted to heat something up, we had to use the stove! Imagine that!

And our parents told us to stay outside and play… all day long. Oh, no, no electronics to soothe and comfort. And if you came back inside…you were doing chores!  And car seats – oh, please! Mom threw you in the back seat and you hung on. If you were luckily, you got the “safety arm” across the chest at the last moment if she had to stop suddenly, and if your head hit the dashboard, well that was your fault for calling “shot gun” in the first place!

See! That’s exactly what I’m talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You’re spoiled rotten! You guys wouldn’t have lasted five minutes back in 1970 or any time before!

Regards,

The Over 40 Crowd                                                                                                     Submitted by Barbara

 

 

WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WASN’T LOOKING

A message every adult should read because children are watching you and doing as you do, not as you say.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately

wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind

to animals.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you make my favorite cake for me, and I learned that the little

things can be the special things in life.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always

talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you make a meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I

learned that we all have to help take care of each other.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw you take care of our house and everyone in it, and I learned we have to take care of what we are given.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn’t

feel good, and I learned that I would have to be responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things

hurt, but it’s all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I learned most of life’s lessons that I need to know to be a good and

productive person when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn’t looking I looked at you and wanted to say,’ Thanks for all the things I saw when

you thought I wasn’t looking.’

To those who do so much for others, but think that no one ever sees. Little eyes see a lot.  Each of us (parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher, and friend) influences the life of a child.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

Editrs Note: Thank you to all those who have submitted articles, ideas, jokes, etc for our newsletter.
If you have a submission for our newsletter please send it to janetstubbert@hotmail.com 

Have a great day!

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