November 2010

November 1, 2010

 “OLD BONES” NEWS

Birthdays in the month of November

♫ Happy Birthday BeaYFrankYAlberta Happy Birthday to you! ♫

Oct 24 to Nov 11 –     Walnut Tree

Walnut Tree (Passion) — unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate. ,

Nov 12 to Nov 21 –     Chestnut Tree

Chestnut Tree (Honesty) — of unusual stature, impressive, well-developed sense of justice, fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be irritated easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes acts superior, feels not understood at times, fiercely family oriented, very loyal in love, physically fit.

Nov 22 to Dec 01 –     Ash Tree

Ash Tree (Ambition) — extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless lover, sometimes money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs love and much emotional support.

WE JUST KEEP GETTING BETTER WITH AGE

Shown below is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an 86 year old woman.  The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.

Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.  By my calculations, three nanoseconds mush have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honour it.  I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension, an agreement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years.  You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30.00 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.  My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.  I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh and blood person.  My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope.  Please find attached an Application Contract which I require your chosen employee to complete.  I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.  Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets, and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.  In due course, at MY Convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number whish he/she must quote in dealing with me.  I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service.  As they say, imitation is the sincerest from of flattery.

Press buttons as follows: IMMEDIATELY AFTER DIALING, PRESS THE STAR (*) BUTTON FOR ENGLISH

#1        To make an appointment to see me

#2        To query a missing payment

#3        To transfer the call to my living room incase I am there.

#4        To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.

#5        To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.

#6        To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.

#7        To leave a message on my computer, a password to asses my computer is required.           Password will be communicated to you at a later date to that Authorized Contact mentioned      earlier.

#8        To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.

#9        To make a general complaint or inquiry.  The contact will then be put on hold, pending the    attention of my automated answering service.

#10     This is a second reminder to press* for English.  While this may, on occasion, involve a        lengthy wait,    uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.

Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.

Your Humble Client                                                                                                  

 (Remember:  This was written by an 86 year old woman –“YA JUST GOTTA LOVE’ US SENIORS”!!!!)    And remember: Don’t make old people mad.  We don’t like being old in the first place, so it doesn’t take much to set us off.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Contributed by Angela

 

 

Helpful Hints

 

Use Cooking Spray as an Ice Repellent

Averting icy buildup: Before clearing snow off a driveway, liberally spray both sides of a plastic or metal shovel with cooking spray. The ice will slide right off the oily surface.

 Reward: Smoother snow removal.

Aluminum Foil as Wrinkle Remover

 

To get wrinkles out of silk, wool, and rayon clothes that can’t take direct heat, place a piece of foil on your ironing board, then lay the garment flat over it. With the steam button down, pass the iron three to four inches above (over) the fabric several times. Wet heat radiating from the foil helps smooth out wrinkles.

Salt

1.         Clean up a cracked egg. Cover the mess with a handful of salt, and then wipe up with ease.

2.         Dust a wreath. Place a wreath of pinecones or faux evergreen in a paper bag with a 1/4      cup of salt. Fold the top of the bag over and gently shake.

3.         Remove tea stains. Sprinkle salt on a lemon peel, and then rub it on a tea-stained cup.

4          Shine brass and copper. Make a paste of a few tablespoons of white vinegar with equal      parts salt and flour. Apply with a soft cloth, rinse, and dry.

 

Scour Your Coffee Grinder with Rice

To scour your coffee grinder:  Mill a handful of grains and the fine particles will absorb stale odors and clean out residual grounds and oil. Discard rice and wipe clean.

 Reward: A cleaner cup of coffee (another take on rice and beans).

 

 

 

LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE

All Nude and Tanned

Pfft!

(Sign – Nude Beach)

Ah!  A new member…welcomes to our club, my friend!   You don’t seem too happy.  Is something wrong?

Well Forget about that!  Why are all of you here?

I’m a banker.  I work hard all year, so I’m here to relax.

And you?

I’m a lawyer… I love nudism” I’ve been coming here for ten years.

I’m a computer programmer…Here everyone is nude and are all the same, it’s nice.  And you sir?

I’m a pickpocket.

Huh?

My doctor sent me here for rehabilitation!

In case you did not know….. Women are Angels and when someone breaks our wings we simply continue to fly……on a broomstick…After all we are flexible…                                                                                                                                                                                  Contributed by Barbara

These are classified ads, which were actually placed in a U.K. news paper.

Free Yorkshire terrier, 8 years old.  Hateful little bastxxx…. bites.

Free puppies – ½ cocker spaniel, ½ sneaky neighbor’s dog.

Free puppies:  Mother, a kennel club registered German shepherd.  Father, Super Dog – able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

Cows, Calves, never bred, also, one gay bull for sale.

Joining nudist colony.  Must sell washer and dryer

Wedding dress for sale.  Worn once by mistake.  Call Stephanie and the Winner is…

For sale by owner; Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica – 45 volumes – Excellent condition, 200 pounds or best offer.  No longer needed:  Got married last month – wife knows every bloody thing.                                                                                                                           

                                                                                                                                                Submitted by Pat

 

 

 

Dublin Sunday school

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if hey understood the concept of getting to heaven.

 I asked them, ‘If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?’

 ‘NO!’ the children answered.

 ‘If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?’

Again, the answer was ‘NO!’

By now I was starting to smile. ‘Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?

Again, they all answered ‘NO!’.

 I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, ‘Then how can I get into heaven?’

 A six year-old boy shouted out: “YUV GOTTA BE … DEAD….”

 It’s a curious race, the Irish.

THE COMPUTER SWALLOWED GRANDMA

The computer swallowed grandma.

Yes, honestly it’s true! She pressed ‘control’ and ‘enter’ and disappeared from view.

It devoured her completely,

The thought just makes me squirm. She must have caught a virus or been eaten by a worm.

I’ve searched through the recycle bin and files of every kind;

I’ve even used the Internet, But nothing did I find.

In desperation, I asked Jeeves My searches to refine.

The reply from him was negative, not a thing was found ‘online.’

So, if inside your ‘Inbox,’ My Grandma you should see,

Please ‘Copy,’ Scan’ and ‘Paste’ her and send her back to me.

This is a tribute to all the Grandmas who have been fearless and learned to use the Computer…..

They are the greatest!!!                                                                                Submitted by Barbara

 

 

 

The potty 

A little three year old boy is sitting on the toilet. His mother thinks he has been in there too long, so she goes in to see what’s up.  The little boy is sitting on the toilet reading a book.  But about every 15 seconds or so, he  puts the book down, grips onto the toilet seat with his left hand and hits himself on top of his head with his right hand. 

His mother says: “Billy, are you all right? You’ve been in here for a while.”

Billy says:   “I’m fine, mommy. I just haven’t gone potty’ yet.” 

Mother says:  “ok, you can stay here a few more minutes. But, Billy, why are you hitting yourself on the head?”

Billy says:  “works for ketchup.”                                                                              

We do not stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

Never be the first to get old!                                                             Submitted by Barbara

A young woman on a flight from Rome asked the priest beside her, 

“Father, may I ask a favor?”

‘Of course child..  What can I do for you?’

“Well, I bought an expensive woman’s electric hair dryer for my Mother’s birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and I’m afraid they’ll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me?  Under your robes perhaps….

  ‘I would love to help you dear, but I must warn you:  I will not lie.’

 “With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.”

 When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her…

 The Official asked:  “Father, do you have anything to declare?”

 ‘From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.’

 The Official thought this answer strange, so he asked:

“And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?”

 ‘I have a MARVELOUS INSTRUMENT designed to be used on a woman, but which is to date, unused.’

 Roaring with laughter, the official said:   “Go ahead, Father.  Next.”

                                                                                                                        Submitted by Barbara

The Gazette, July 2010         Josh Freed on Vacation Mishaps

I was on holidays in England recently with some British friends with whom my wife and I have vacationed for years – and this time I was determined not to do anything wrong.

There’d be no more incidents like the Exploding Stove or the Fried Kettle.

And there weren’t, until I took a shower one day while my hosts were away.  It was an old British bathtub and afterward I had trouble closing the antiquated faucets.

The cold water faucet wouldn’t shut, so I tried the shower faucet – which was at eye level – but it wouldn’t close either.  Water was pouring from the shower and filling the tub fast.  I turned the faucet a bit harder and the water slowed a bit – hooray!  Then something clicked…

An instant later, the faucet flew right off the wall, followed by a powerful geyser of water that hit me right in the face.  The water was strangely brown and ice cold – and spraying all over my friend’s room.

I knelt frantically to fish the faucet from the bathtub and tried screwing it back in but the water pressure was too strong.  I jammed the faucet against the leak and the geyser slowed somewhat and stopped spraying everywhere – but my hand was numb from the ice cold water and the bathtub was almost overflowing with brown, polluted guck.

It was my own personal BP disaster – I couldn’t take my freezing hand from the hole in the dike.  I was trapped in the tub – so I did what BP did

“HELP!” I shouted desperately, appealing for my wife instead of the government.  “HE-E-ELP!”

She didn’t hear me; maybe she was gone, too.  My luck- if my friends came back they’d find me start naked in the bathroom, hunched in my BP position.  And to be honest it was not my first embarrassing episode.

There was the time I visited their country cottage and put the kettle on the stove – and minutes later I saw smoke.  It turned out it was one of those kettles you insert into an electric base and the bottom had melted right onto the stove.  It took me hours to scrape off – while the smell lasted days and my reputation was ruined for years.

Then we rented a cottage together in Mexico and the first morning there was a nice glass-top stove, just like mine.  I flipped on the gas and was happily frying eggs when the stovetop exploded into 1,000 tiny bits of glass, right in my face – and for a moment I was terrified I’d been blinded or mutilated.

But when I felt my face there was no blood and I was covered in tiny pieces of – plastic.

The glass stovetop was actually a plastic covering meant to b e removed before cooking,

Okay, I’m a bit of a klutz.  You’ve heard of Mr. Fix It?  I’m Mr. Break it.  So now here I was battling the faucet, naked in the bath – and I couldn’t believe it was happening again.

Why had I taken a shower anyway?  This was the last time I would ever wash in a foreign land.

By now my wife had finally heard my screaming and rushed in to see my predicament – and her face expressed both shock and a “not again!” look.

As I manned the dike she fiddled with the faucets and got some warm water going, so my hands could thaw out.

Then she started bailing brown water from the tub and heaving it out the window.  As my hands co warmed I tried screwing in the faucet again – and finally it caught slightly and slid partway into place.  Water was still poring from the shower, but less – and the bathtub had stabilized at half-full, so the house would not be flooded by brown water.

At least I was more successful than BP.

A while later, my friends returned and I met them outside with a casual question about where the main water valve was.  But the wife’s face blanched.  “Ohmigood, Josh! What have you done this time?” she said – and rushed indoors.

By now we had mopped the floor and the shower wasn’t leaking brown water as badly, and things looked under control for an environmental disaster zone.

The caretaker came, but he couldn’t fix it, so the rest of the week we had no shower – and I wasn’t allowed to touch anything but my toothbrush.

Still, all’s well that ends well and I’m looking forward to our next holiday together, especially since their 11 year old daughter Rosie told me: “Things are so exciting when you’re aloud, Josh.”

Until then, I want BP to know – I’m available.

Josh Freed                                                                                                                Submitted by Frank

 

 

 

BUTTERCUPS & GOLF BALLS!

Towards the end of the golf course, Tom hit his ball into the woods and found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.  All of a sudden . . . POOF!!  In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman appeared.          She said, “I’m Mother Nature!”

“Do you know how long it took me to make those buttercups?”

“Just for doing what you have done, you won’t have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life; better still, you won’t have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life …  As a matter of fact, you’ll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!!!”

Then POOF! . . . She was gone!

After Tom recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend,

 “Fred, where are you?”

 Fred yells back, “I’m over here in the pussy willows.”  

Tom shouts back, ‘DON’T SWING, Fred; FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON’T SWING!

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Barbara

 

 

An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him ‘How do you expect to get into Heaven?’
The boy thought it over and said, ‘Well, I’ll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, ‘For Heaven’s  sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!”

                                                                                                          Submitted by Pat

When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower.
She said, ‘Mummy, you are getting fat!’
I replied, ‘Yes, honey, remember Mummy has a baby growing in her tummy.’
 ‘I know,’ she replied, but what’s growing in your bum?’
                                                                                                          Submitted by Pat

 

One Liners

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him.

I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding?  That’s my idea of a perfect day!

Remember the good old days when “Freeze dried” meant time to bring in the; laundry.

If you are such a good cook why do we have to pray before we eat?                 Submitted by Pat

 
WORLD’S EASIEST QUIZ!  Answers on page 18.  (Passing requires 3 correct answers out of 10!)

1) How long did the Hundred Years’ War last?

2) Which country makes Panama hats?

3) From which animal do we get cat gut?

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?

5) What is a camel’s hair brush made of?

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?

7) What was King George VI’s first name?

8) What color is a purple finch?

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?

 

Inspirational

 

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 Hours in a day is not enough,

Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.  He then asked the students, if the jar was full.  They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.   He shook the jar lightly.  The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.  They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. The sand filled up everything else.  He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.  The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor,   as the laughter subsided, ‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things – family, children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions – Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else –The small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ He continued, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, You will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So…Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play With your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

‘Take care of the golf balls first — The things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.’

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled. ‘I’m glad you asked’. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’-Submitted by Barbara

 

 

 

This was written by an 83-year-old woman to her friend. *

The last line says it all. *  Enjoy!   ‘I Hope You Dance .!!!

Dear Bertha               

            I’m reading more and dusting less.  I’m sitting in the yard and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden.

            I’m spending more time with my family and friends and less time working. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to endure. I’m trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.

            I’m not ‘saving’ anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the first Amaryllis blossom.

            I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries. I’m not saving my good perfume for special parties, but wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank. ‘Someday’ and ‘one of these days’ are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it’s worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now !!

            I’m not sure what others would’ve done had they known they wouldn’t be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would have called family members and a few close friends.

They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles.

I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner or for whatever their favourite food was. I’m guessing; I’ll never know.

            It’s those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn’t written certain letters that I intended to write one of these days.  Angry and sorry that I didn’t tell my husband and parents often enough how much I truly love them.

            I’m trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special.  Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God!

            ‘People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don’t need to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there.’

            Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!!

            (signature missing)

                                                                                                                        Submitted by Barbara

Days celebrated by ‘Old Bones’

 

Thanksgiving Day

On, October the 11th, Thanksgiving Day the CCS Rosemount/St. Michel Center was closed.

However, a very special dinner was prepared with love for us by Ivylin on the 4th of October to commemorate our friendships, all that is good in our lives, and to acknowledge we have much to be thankful for.

On the menu: was: Roasted Squash Soup, Dinner Rolls,  Cranberries and apples rolled  inside a Roast pork  Loin, Wild Rice, Plumb Sauce, Salad, Upside down Plumb cake with vanilla ice-cream, Tea and Coffee.

Frank blessed the food and Cheryl led us in personal acknowledgement of the many family members, friends, unknown people, events and things in our lives that have made us what and who we are to-day.

October Fest

The men wore handsome hats of various colours.  Frank said his was a reminder of when he was a young man of eighteens years of age. 

The ladies wore wonderful braids tied with colourful ribbon under various styles of hats.  I believe the hats and braids were made by various members of the group.  All the ladies wore aprons and the men wore hats with at least one of the men sporting red suspenders.

Music supplied by Dolores filled the hall with energy. And to go along with the energizing music great there was great food to celebrate the day.

Pretzels and soft drinks were served before dinner and on the

Menu was: German and Italian Sausage, Sour Croat, Homemade Pickled Beets, Sautéed Red Cabbage and Boiled Potatoes

Hot tea and scrumptious birthday cake was served to celebrate the birth of two amazing women; Edith and Eva. 

Don’t you wish you were there!

Halloween at our Center

Dolores and Jeannette created a game that had everyone in stitches.  Music was played and a baton passed around the circle.  The person holding that baton when the music stopped had to reach into a bag and retrieve a piece of clothing.  You’re right!  The finely clad men and women were a sight to be seen!  

On the menu was first and foremost laughter.

We who missed it you missed a great time.

Our Trip to Mt. Tremblant

The sun smiled down on us as Steve, the nicest bus driver we have ever had the pleasure of meeting, pulled up, welcomed us on board and then whisked us away on a great voyage.

It was a warm (20 deg.) balmy day that just kept getting better and better.

Steve had taken the day off work to drive our happy group up north for a day of beautiful scenery sprinkled with delicious dining, and some fun playing the machines. 

The warm, sun filled day and clear fresh air was a much needed change from the city. 

A big “Thank you” to Joanne, Natasha, Steve, Frank and to everyone who made the trip possible. 

Days to celebrate in November

Monday, November 1, 2010 – All Saints’ Day also known as All Hallows Tide, All-Hallomas, or All Hallows’ Day gives those who observe it time to reflect and pray for friends or family members who are deceased.

According to some sources, the idea for All Saints’ Day goes back to the fourth century when the Greek Christians kept a festival on the first Sunday after Pentecost (in late May or early June) in honor of all martyrs and saints.  Sources say that a commemoration of “All Martyrs” was celebrated as early as 270.

Pope Gregory IV proclaimed All Saints’ Day a holiday in 837 CE.   It is speculated that the chosen date, November 1, may have been an attempt to supplant the pagan Festival of the Dead (also known as Samhain or the feast of Saman, lord of death).  All Saints’ Day is closely tied with All Souls’ Day. The liturgical color on All Saints’ Day is white.

People held festivals for the dead long before Christianity. However, All Soul’s Day celebrated on Nov 2 in Canada was first instituted at the monastery in Cluny in 993 CE and quickly spread throughout the Christian world. Saint Odilo, the abbot of Cluny in France, proposed that the day after All Saints’ Day be set aside to honor the departed, particularly those whose souls were still in purgatory.

Remembrance Day November 11, 2010

Remembrance Day marks the anniversary of the official end of the World War I hostilities on November 11, 1918

In May 2000 the remains of a Canadian soldier who died in France in World War I, but was never been identified, were laid in the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier at the National War Memorial in Ottawa. Since then, members of the public have laid poppies, letters and photographs on the tomb.

Remembrance Day is a national public holiday for many federal government employees, private businesses, provincial governments and schools in Canada. Its status varies by province.

 

Informative

 

Canadian Economy – How to save some American and Canadian jobs and we can help!

I want to share with you some great information that I found out purely by accident. I believe it can also save and create jobs in North America while giving people better customer service.

So how many times have you called a companies service phone line and found that the rep. can barely speak English?

Once with a major mortgage company it was so bad I demanded to speak with someone who spoke English. Right at that moment I broke the code, the secret password for customer service.

Come to find out that every American & Canadian company using overseas operators must transfer you to an American or Canadian rep. by saying.  “I want to speak to a representative in Canada”.  (Don’t take no for an answer!!)   This was confirmed by the American & Canadian reps. that they must transfer you after that request.

I’ve tried it on a half a dozen major companies including cable, bank, phone and mortgage companies. It works every time and I actually get my issues taken care of. ..

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Barbara

 

 

 

 

Let me see if I got this right.

If you cross the North Korean border illegally you get 12 years hard labor.

If you cross the Iranian border illegally you are detained indefinitely.

If you cross the afghan border illegally, you are shot.

If you cross the Saudi Arabian border illegally you will be jailed.

If you cross the Chinese border illegally you may never be heard from again.

If you cross the Venezuelan border illegally you will be branded  a spy and your fate will be sealed.

If you cross the Cuban border illegally you will be thrown into Political prison to rot.

If you cross the US. or Canadian  border illegally you get a  job, A drivers license, Social insurance card, Welfare,   Food vouchers, Subsidized rent or a loan to buy a house,  Free education, Free health care, A lobbyist in Ottawa , Millions of dollars worth of public documents printed in your language, The right to carry your Country’s flag while you protest that you don’t get enough respect 

And, in many instances, you can vote.

I just wanted to make sure I had a firm grasp on the situation! It’s time to wake up, Canada!!!!!                                                                   

                                                                                                            Submitted by Ted

 

 

Did You Know?

Peggy’s Cove

One of the most photographed places in Canada, Peggy’s Cove is more than picturesque.  It is a magical place with simple charm and timeless spirit.  The village itself dates from 1811, but the rugged landscape of huge boulders is over 10,000 years old – remains of the last glaciers.

The quaint lighthouse that sits high upon the smooth, wave-worn granite coast is the focal point of this tiny fishing village.  While the world-famous lighthouse no longer serves as a beacon, it does operate as a summertime post office – the only Canadian post office housed in a lighthouse.

                                                                                                            Submitted by Frank

Movies like Jaws have made us afraid of sharks.  Yet are these fish really that dangerous?  Although sharks are one of the most feared animals, fatal attacks on humans are fairly rare in comparison to many other incidents.  Fatal attacks by dogs outnumber sharks ten and more times per year and you are more likely to be hit by lightning.

Sharks are the only animals that never get sick: they are immune to every known disease including cancer.  Their body frames are not made up of bones – they are made of cartilage, the tough, fibrous tissue that shapes our noses and ears.  Instead of scales shark skins have shall tooth-like spikes that are so sharp that shark skin has long been used as sandpaper.

 It is thought that some types of big sharks, including the Great White, change sex when they reach a certain size: males become females to ensure survival of their species

                                                                                                          Submitted by Frank

 

 

 

History

Early settlers and natives swapped food by Eric Major

 

            In the earliest days of European settlement in Quebec – the “contact period,” historians call it – native peoples and colonists learned rapidly about each others’ foods. The result was an expanded and enriched diet for both groups, although the process was not always smooth.

            The French quickly adopted a number of local foods such as corn, maple sugar, and pumpkins, while their native counterparts became partial to certain foods introduced by Europeans, in particular raisins, prunes, peas, biscuits, and cakes of different kinds.

            Needless to say, these exchanges sometimes produced culinary and cultural shocks.  Brandy, for instance, was not without some serious consequences for the natives, while the French initially turned their noses at potatoes and tomatoes.

            Many natives were frankly revolted when they tried some European foods for the first time.  Paul Lejeune recounted in 1634 that the Montagnais were horrified when the saw their guests eating wine and biscuits: “Our savages said that the French were drinking blood and eating wood.”

            The abundance of salt in French dishes also occasionally overpowering for their Huron and Montagnais allies, whose diets were virtually salt free.  The Jesuits observed in 1646, in fact, that natives saw no need for condiments, “and also, they eat meat with no bread, no salt or sauce other than their appetite.”

            They refused to eat salted food because it “smells bad.” The Jesuits also noted that “the salt used to season all meats one eats in Europe makes them bitter to the Savages’’ taste.” Indeed, they considered salt a poison; we are told, and refused to let their children touch it.

            The English settlers found much the same in their dealings with the natives around the Hudson Bay in the 18th century.

            Arthur Dobbs (1744) in fact reported that while natives were particularly fond of prunes and raisins, they continued to disdain cheese, “having taken up an Opinion that it is made of dead Men’s fat.”

            The explorer Samuel Hearne, for his part, noted that natives did not seem to like bread, “for though some of them would put a bit of it into their mouths, they soon spit it out again with evidence marks of dislike.”

            Some of them expressed their revulsion event more eloquently.  In one Hudson’s Bay Company newspaper (Moose “Fort, 1742) it was reported that a man known as Esquawino had developed the technique “of holding his garment to his nose when (he) enters ye Factory to avoid ye ill scent” and  “refusing to eat any victuals dressed in any Utensil of ours.”

                                                                                                                                    Submitted by Frank

Important Medical Alert you need to know especially since we are well into the Flu season…..

FDA is alerting consumers that:

Zicam Cold Remedy Nasal Gel,

Zicam Cold Remedy Nasal Swabs, and

Zicam Cold Remedy Swabs, Kids Size, (a discontinued product)

Consumers may still have in their homes, have all been associated with long lasting or permanent loss of smell (referred to as anosmia).

If you have Zicam in your medicine cabinet–THROW IT AWAY!

To Loss Of Sense Of Smell, FDA Says. Science Daily. Retrieved October 25, 2010, from http://www.sciencedaily.com­/releases/2009/06/090618130709.htm

 

Editor’s Note: This article is not intended to provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment

 

Remembrance Day… Lest we Forget

The Price of Victory

The price of Victory was high.  Canadian war cemeteries around the world bear testimony to their sacrifices. “At the going down of the sun, and in the morning, we shall remember them.

Also remembered are the many young men from the opposing side.

Frank mentioned to me that a friend of his said was on the front line when they received news that the war had ended.  He said at the news the war had ended the German troops threw down their guns.  The Canadian troops threw down theirs and they all went together to share a drink and to celebrate the end of a horrible experience in their lives. 

We Will Remember

They went with songs to battle

They were young, straight of limb, True of eye, steady and aglow.

They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted

They fell with their faces to the foe.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old

Age shall not weary them, nor do the years condemn.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning

We will remember them.

We will remember them.

 

Aug 20, 1940 Quote by Churchill

British Prime Minister Winston Churchill says of the Royal Air Force, “Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few”.                                            Submitted by Frank

From: Promise you’ll Take Care of My Daughter 

The Remarkable War Brides of WW11 by Ben Wicks

 

Surrounded by falling bombs, strict rationing and nightly blackouts, a generation of young women found love.  They were the war brides; British and European women who married Canadian servicemen in WW@.  After tearful goodbyes to their families, they embarked on a grueling journey by ship and train to join their husbands and in-laws in a new country.  Once they arrived, many war brides had to confront culture shock and desperate homesickness before embracing their new lives in Canada.

Muriel Anst said she was so busy preparing herself and two small children to come to Canada that she gave little thought to the leaving until she was actually on the ship.

“It was when the band played Will ye No Come Back Again? that it hit me.” said Muriel “I thought,’ What am I doing, leaving my mother and my brother and my relatives?’ I wanted to jump out and go back to my family.

Hazel West of Tabor recalls that same sad song.  As the ship was pulling away from the dock, I had that strange feeling that the dock was moving away and I was standing still.  We could see these people, and the band was playing sad songs… I said to myself, what have I done?  Hey, you’re leaving your country; you’re leaving your people.”  “Until that moment it had all been romance and happiness.  We were so young and impulsive.

Edna McDonald, n own of Calgary, said she felt the same way.

“As we were going past Land’s End, we were all crying our eyes out” said Edna “We were saying. ‘What have we done? In those days, it wasn’t a case of flying home if we didn’t like it.

It is now more that …years since a unique army of your women arrived on the shores of Canada.  Some found they could not cope with living so far from their loves ones back home, and they returned, who can blame them?  The love between a war bride and her husband rested on shifting sand, for time was so precious during war that lifetime decisions were often made and sealed within a matter of weeks.  Having made their commitment, however most of these wives worked diligently, against great odds, and created a satisfying life for themselves, their husbands and children.

 

ANSWERS to Quiz

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?                          116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats?                                                 Ecuador

3) From which animal do we get cat gut?                                               Sheep and Horses

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?         November

5) What is a camel’s hair brush made of?                                               Squirrel fur

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?          Dogs

7) What was King George VI’s first name?                                            Albert

8) What color is a purple finch?                                                             Crimson

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?                                             New Zealand
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?            Orange (of course!)

What do you mean, you failed?!!  Me, too…!!!  (And if you try to tell me you passed, you lie!)

                                                                                                            Submitted by Barbara

We have reason to celebrate

Alberta Patterson celebrates her 100th birthday on November 2nd.

Bea Thompson will be 95 years young on November 17th

Frank hasn’t divulged his age (smile)

Happy birthday and God bless you!

 

Important Note:

Remember to change your clock (fall back) on November 7, 2010

 Submit articles for our “Old Bones News” to janetstubbert@hotmail.com

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